Daugher to Father
by Vampire Queen of NOLA
Summary: This is something I don't see much of- or any, really- so I kind of wanted to explore it. There was never much shown on how Caroline really dealt with her father's death during the aftermath, and so I got the feeling she kind of bottled it all up. This is my take on her fighting to finally get closure, and the friend that's there when she needs someone most.


The chill that permeated the air was harsh, unforgiving; it was nearing midnight in the graveyard, and only one figure moved amongst the headstones, blonde waves concealing her face from any who might see her. Strength was something Caroline Forbes prided herself on, an ability to overcome and grow from any and every experience life- or unlife- threw her way. But tonight, as she stepped carefully through the moonlight, she couldn't feel even an ounce of that strength. The funeral had come and gone, the well-wishes, the calls made to the man her father loved and to family friends to alert them of what had happened. She could almost still feel the weight of the hands that had clasped her shoulder time and again, feel how hollow her thanks had been as they had fallen from her lips.

Her boots crunched into the chilled soil beneath her, reminding her that so long had passed since his death, and still, she wasn't over it. Still, she struggled daily with the warring emotions inside of her, telling her to hate him, to love him, to understand, to be confused, to cry, to move on- but the moment she finally stopped in front of his headstone, it was as though the storm within her suddenly fell quiet. It wasn't gone, merely surrounding her, waiting to pounce when she least expected it. She knew that. Caroline wasn't an idiot. Pain like that didn't simply _vanish._ It lingered, festering and growing with each passing day until it felt like it could absolutely consume, and God, it was terrifying to think about. She hadn't told a single soul how much she struggled with his death, had bottled it all inside because she didn't know who she could talk to.

Slowly, she dropped to her knees in front of the cold stone that marked her father's grave, staring at it as though it could give her all the answers. What to do. What was okay, what wasn't. And most importantly- why she even had to deal with all of this. There had been a choice, eternity with his daughter or death. Stay, as she'd begged him to do when she was ten and he had refused- stay, as she had begged him yet again the day he was facing his death like some sort of proud warrior and he was dying for some sort of noble cause- but what cause? What was he accomplishing? He'd broken her heart when she was only ten, nearly vanished from her life completely save for the few planned occasions she had to go to him and share his attentions with the daughter of his boyfriend.

_"G-God… How can you hate who I am so much?!" _

_"No, no, sweetheart, I don't hate you. I love you. You're strong. You're beautiful. You're good. And even after everything that's happened to you, you are exactly who your mother and I hoped you would grow up to be." _

_"Then please, don't leave me, Daddy. Please! Please, don't leave me!"_

"You _lied_ to me," she whispered brokenly, tears flooding her vision as she thought back to her last night with her father. The walls she'd thrown up since that night were crumbling down, and it was only a few moments before her silent tears turned to whole-hearted sobbing, ever bit of her anger finally spilling free. "You could have _stayed!_ I-I needed you, I still do, Daddy! I needed you when I was ten and you left Mom! A-and even, even after you tortured me, you said I would never be okay, I _loved_ you! You didn't see me graduate, you didn't take me to college…" Her agony was clawing at her insides, ripping into her heart, and she doubled over, arms around her middle, her sobs splitting the night air and dispelling the suffocating silence that had been lingering throughout the graveyard.

He had missed so much in her life because he'd found himself a new family with Steven and his daughter, and now, he wouldn't see who she was becoming. She was proud of who she was, but in the back of her mind, a disturbingly persistent voice told her time and again that she shouldn't be. The scars from the torture had never healed. He'd never been around long enough to _help_ her heal. There were nights when she woke in tears because she'd had another nightmare about being bound to that damn chair, his voice echoing in his mind, that he would _fix her._ How was she supposed to believe he loved her despite her vampirism after that, when he gave everything up for the sheer purpose of _not_ becoming a vampire?

He hated her still when he died. He had lied to her. It seemed like a fact, felt like nothing less than a hard, heartbreaking truth, and it was grabbing at her from all sides, threatening to tear her apart. She'd been a daddy's girl, before everything changed, and had still considered herself one even if the most interaction she normally got was a phone call. She had strove to be a daughter he could be proud of, because he had been her hero, the strongest person she knew in the world. After everything, she had failed in that, and she had no chance of making him truly proud now. All Caroline had wanted was to fix things. She wanted her Daddy back. So often in her life, she was left lost and confused, and she'd reach for her phone, only to remember, _Daddy won't pick up. Daddy's gone._

"Caroline?" She couldn't breathe. Couldn't catch her breath, her chest tight and burning with pain, and when she failed to respond through her tears, she felt strong arms wrap around her, pulling her into a hug. "Shhh. Hey, calm down, deep breaths. It's okay, I'm here." _Stefan._ Blindly, the blonde pressed closer to him, trying to force herself to calm down. Bottling up everything had been a very, very bad idea, that much was obvious- everything was overwhelming her.

"Wh-why… _why_ did he hate me?!"

"Hey. Hey, look at me, okay? Here…" Stefan pulled away just enough to take her tear-stained face in his hands; he was kneeling beside her, worry creasing his brow. "He loved you, Caroline. But sometimes, people fear the unknown so much that they won't take that chance, no matter how much they love the person begging them to. Your dad made mistakes, but he loved you, in the end." Caroline pressed her lips together, fighting back the urge to lash out and tell her friend that he was wrong- of all people, Stefan wouldn't lie to her, not about this. He wouldn't say anything like this unless he was absolutely certain.

"I miss h-him, I don't want to hate him, I…" In a moment, his arms were around her once more, pulling her into his chest as the words finally failed her.

"It's okay, Care. Just let go. Let it all out. I'm here."


End file.
